childlikemind
Town => All in one fun => Topic started by: MS.China on July 17, 2017, 04:46:34 pm
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Amber put some shoes on please
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Amber
"Are we going somewhere?"
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Yes you and me are
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Amber
*go upstairs and put shoes on*
Jenny
*wonder where they're going*
Amber
*come downstairs* "Where are we going?"
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I'll tell you in the car. Ms womzie is watching the rest of the kids
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Amber
"Okay."
Amber and Jenny
*hug goodbye*
Amber
*head out to car*
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*gets in the car after amber*
We are going to go see Jackson for a little bit
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*excitedly* "Really?"
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Yes but before we go you have a rules number one do not say you are stupid number two do not let him tell you what to do if he does ask me if it's OK Before you do anything he says and number three when it's time to go do not cry in front of him if you feel you need to cry do it in the car
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Will you follow these rules? If not we can go back in the house
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"Why can't I cry in front on him?"
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Because he will see that as something he can use to control you more
I'm not gonna explain it to you it's just a rule you gotta follow now do you agree so we can go or do u want to go back in the house
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"I can follow the first two, but I can't control when I cry." *scared*
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You better hold it til we get to the car or if u feel u gotta cry tell me and you can step outside the door
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"Okay, but won't he know then?"
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Just try to hold it til we get to the car okay
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"I'll try."
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Okay. Drives there and gets out and gets amber out and checks in sits in the visiting room with amber waiting for Jackson to come out*
You ready to see Jackson?
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Amber
*nod, excitedly*
Jackson
*walk in*
Amber
*run up to him and hug him*
Jackson
*hug her back*
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Watches them hug*
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Jackson
*step back* "You've grown." *glad that getting enough to eat has been affecting her, but more annoyed because I want her to stay as tiny as possible*
Amber
*smile* "Really?"
Jackson
"Yeah, and I think I have a bit too."
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Listens to their conversation as I scroll through my phone on Facebook
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Jackson
"How have you been doing?"
Amber
"Good. I mostly play with Jenny. She's my new best friend, other then you and Horsie."
Jackson
"Good." *lie and feel bad that I wish she had no friends*
Amber
"I've been learning how to count at school, and the alphabet. I'm also taking ballet and karate lessons."
Jackson
*surprised, and upset* "Karate is not good for little girls."
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Yes it is Jackson.
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Jackson
*wrap arm around Amber and look at Ms. China* "How is that so?"
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BecaUse it is. If anyone ever hurts her or tries to do something bad she can defend herself . And she is good at karate and ballet anything else?
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Jackson
"If someone tries to hurt her she's totally screwed. She a helpless little girl."
Amber
*tears welling up in my eyes* "No!"
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No she is not that's the reason she's learning to defend herself and karate has taught her a lot already
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Jackson
*look at Amber angrily, and wrap arm tightly around her* "You know better then to talk back to me."
Amber
*look at Ms. China, and start to cry*
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Grabs amber away from Jackson*
Yells* she can say whatever she wants to you!!
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Jackson
*start to loosen my grip on her, until I wrap my other arm around her as well, and pull*
Amber
*cry, because this hurts and I'm scared*
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*picks Jackson up and throws him on the couc easily not in a painful way just in an authoritative way*
Boy have several seats. Places amber in a chair*
Now either one of you get up from those seats this visit is over
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Amber
*wipe tears away with Horsie's nose, thinking he's licking them away*
Jackson
*glare at Amber* "Are you going to apologize?"
Amber
*shake head, nervously*
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No she is not going to apologize. But you will apologize to her for grabbing her like that
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Jackson
"sorry Amber" *lying*
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Oh no... no no and nope. You didn't mean that. So say it like u mean it or we leaving
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Jackson
*sigh, try to sound convincing* "I'm sorry Amber."
Amber
*believe him* "I forgive you."
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*looks at him* I still don't believe you
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Jackson
"I'm was not apologizing to you. I'm apologizing to her, and she forgave me."
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I don't care what you have to understand is that no matter what you will be nice to her and respect her. So actually being sorry for something is saying you respect her enough to really apologize when you are wrong
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Jackson
"Why do you favor her so much?"
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Because she is a very important person. She deserves respect. And she deserves to have a brother who actually loves her who is not mean to her and who is happy when she learns new things and a brother that will teach her things that she can use through out her life. That's why. Also because I won't let you continue to treat her like ****. Any other dumb question?
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Jackson
*very upset* "What are you talking about? I love her."
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Nah no you don't. If you did you wouldn't be mean to her. And I've talked to you so much about this stuff something should have dunked in your head. But at this point I'm done talking. Because I see you don't listen. So I'm done I give up
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Jackson
"But I'm only mean to her because I love her."
Amber
*look at Ms. China, wondering what her giving up means*
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I already told you what you doing. Amber lets go *picks her up and grabs our stuff and walks out goes to the car puts amber in her seat and drives away*
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Amber
*looks at him sadly, grip Horsie extra tight and lean into Ms. China's chest as she carries me out to the car, and then start sobbing hysterically*
Jackson
*start punching the wall, repeatedly*
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Drives amber home and tells her to go inside with every one else*
I watch her as she goes in and thinks about what to do with Jackson
I think military school is a good option
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Amber
*go inside, still sobbing*
Jenny
*sees Amber, goes up to her and hugs her*
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Drives back up to where Jackson is goes in and talks to his counselor*
I think military school is Jacksons next freaking step seriously
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Counselor
*sighs* "He was doing so well until just now."
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Yup I don't know why he not learning very well but i pretty much give up maybe military school will teach him
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Counselor
*shocked* "Your giving up on him."
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Yup I quit
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"Why?"
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He has been here for a while now. You people are supposed to be making him learn about loving himself and seeing that he is very a important person. You are also supposed to be teaching him it's ok to just be a kid. You are also supposed to be mentoring him and showing him what's it like to be loved helping him with his anger issues disciplining him so type of way to show him that he won't always get what he want and lots of other crap you guys are ranked #1 in the entire country for! I have talked to him since I met him tried to show him love tried to teach him I mean even since he been here I talk to him about his issues and especially how he supposed to treat his sister.NOTHING I'm doing or y'all doing is working soooo i quit
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"Some kids take a really long time. He's a little better then he was when he first came to us, or at least he was before he saw his sister."
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Yeah. But remember that's one of the main freaking reasons he is here for and if you guys aren't teaching him it's not ok to be mean to his sister and all that maybe military school will. I mean they may not teach him that exactly but you can bet your ass. That he gonna learn to follow instructions and have respect for people
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"Well, good luck with that."
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yup. I'm gonna go tell him. *walks to jacksons room*
Hey you going to Military school
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Jackson
*shocked* "What? Why?"
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Why do you think
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"Because you hate me."
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Oh if you think that I can't change your mind that's on you. I already told you I don't hate you and never will. But you don't learn anything and you haven't changed really since you been here you have showed me you will always be abusive toward amber and that I will not allow
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*yells* "I have every right to be. She's mine."
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She's mine now
Okay I'm leaving because you acting like you don't understand nothing so bye
Walks out door
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Amber
*walks up to Ms. China, when she walks threw the door* "Did I do something wrong?"
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No why?
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"You and Jackson both got mad."
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I got mad because Jackson was being controlling again Jackson got mad because he starting to realize I'm not gonna let him control you it was. Nothing you did
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*scared* "Does this mean I'm not going to get to see him again?"
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I don't know yet I haven't decided
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Amber
*sad, thinking about how I was really excited to see him and he just got mad at me*
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It will take me a minute to decide
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*scared* "Is Jackson going to stay mad at me?"
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He is not mad at you
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"He was when I was with him."
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No he wasn't he was. Really mad at me
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"Then why was he so mean to me?"
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Because he can't be mean to me so he's tries to be mean to you because he knows you will let him do it and not defend yourself from him. So because you allow him to treat you meanly then he's going to continue to do mean stuff to you because you let him
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"I told him no." *thinks of how hard that was for me*
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yeah you did but you have to actually mean no you have to continue saying something to him you can't just say no and then get scared because you feel like you weren't supposed to say something you allow him to be mean to you and to be abusive to you so as long as you continue to allow it and cry and be scared of him the longer he'll actually be mean to you
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"so I did do something wrong"
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No you just have to work on sticking up for yourself and not being scared of Jackson
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"I can't not be scared of him. He can really hurt."
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Well you good at karate push him off you
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"but he's so much bigger and stronger then I am"
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pinch him. Do something that will hurt I don't know you have to get mad when he starts to treat you like that you can't just be scared. Trust me if you get mad enough and you push him off you with all your strength you will discover you are stronger then you think
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"What pinch?"
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Um I don't know how to explain it but it's like you take to fingers and you just pinch someone as hard as you can
Watch
*pinches my arm showing amber how to do it*
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"He does that to me sometimes. Not as punishment though." *think of how he would do that to me randomly*
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And it hurts right?
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*nod* "sometimes I even start crying because of it*
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So when he hurting you just pinch him as hard as you can that will get him off of you until I or another adult can help you
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*pinch arm* "I can't pinch as hard as he can."
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I'm pretty sure once you have enough of jackson being mean to you and pushing you around when you get mad enough you will find your inner strength from somewhere
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"I don't get mad at Jackson."
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Exactly that's the problem you don't get mad so you let him do whatever he wants to you and he thinks it's OK because all you are going to do is cry and be sad you never get mad
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"Horsie gets mad at him, and Jackson's fine with that."
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Well that's horsie YOU have to get mad because if YOU don't the abuse will continue from him
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"I know I should get mad at him. Horsie's always right, but I never do."
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That's because you feel like it's ok for him to be mean to you and be abusive. If you didn't feel that way then you would get mad and fight back
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"It used to be okay."
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Well it isn't okay anymore. And never really was it just was allowed to happen here it isn't allowed to happen
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"Something can be allowed to happen and not be okay?"
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Yes. Like an example would be like...
Say Jenny took horsie from you and hide him and never gave him back. Then you came and told me but I didn't make Jenny give him back to you. I allowed it to happen but was it ok?
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"No, but Jenny would never do that. Neither would you."
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I'm just using it as an example.
You see how I could allow something to happen but it would not be ok?
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Or what If I see ally hit Jenny and didn't do or say anything about it would that be ok?
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"No. It wouldn't."
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Ok so same thing Jackson was allowed to be abusive to you people saw but didn't say anything so it was allowed but never ok
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"I understand now."
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That's good
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"So, am I going to get to see Jackson again?"
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I don't know Amber I'm not gonna allow him to be abusive to you
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"I'll fight him next time. I promise."
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Amber you have to want to defend yourself from Jackson yourself.
not because I say so.
you really have to get mad at him doing stuff to you because if you don't then it's just going to continue to happen so you telling me that your gonna fight him next time really just means you want to see him again. So you are saying that so you can
because you're really not going to fight him I already know you haven't gotten upset at him yet
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"I can't get upset with him yet. He's not here."
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I know but I'm just saying I can see that some how you think it's ok for Jackson to be abusive to you so I don't think you will stand up for yourself
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"I'm sorry."
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You have to figure out a way to really think about it will you allow Jackson to continue treating you like that or will you just make him not treat you like that you have to figure it out for yourself
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"If I try to fight him off, he'll probably just end up holding me so I can't move, like he did today."
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Well that's when you tell him to let you go you can kick him or punch him or anything you can do you have to to make him let you go at least until an adult can help you you can't keep thinking about what he will do you have to think about what you will do if he does something how will you get out of whatever he's doing to you you have to figure it out
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"I might have been able to kick him, the way he was holding me today, but not when he holds me down on the ground."
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You can bite him
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"um... I could try"
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And when you bite you have to bite as hard as you can you be scared you have to be mad and have it made up in your mind you not going to let him control you and abuse you anymore
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"but he only does it because he loves me"
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Okay amber I give up. If you think that fine let him abuse you
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*gets mad* "No! I don't think it's okay. I just don't know what to do because I know that he only does it because he loves me, and that's confusing."
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Well if you think abuse is showing you love then that's you. I don't abuse you but you can see I love you. But whatever I give up
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"That's why I'm confused. He's always told me that he hurts me because he loves me. I've never understood it."
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That's because he lie to you he don't hurt you because he loves you he does it to control you
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"Oh." *looks down*
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Don't you see? He only hurts you when he wants you to do something or when you talk back to him or something like that righ? As long as you're doing what he wants he doesn't hurt you but is soon as you don't then he does that's controlling he wants to control you and tell you what to do
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*stomp foot* "That's mean."
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I've been trying to tell you that the whole time
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*hear what she says, and then go from angry to sad* "I know."
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So yeah you're going to have to figure that out I can't I'm done trying to talk to you about it because obviously what I say doesn't matter to you anyway because you don't even try to listen you only try to listen to what Jackson says and Jackson is the one being mean to you and lying to you basically he's the one constantly abusing you and you allow it I have done my best to show you that I'm not going to allow him to do it but you have to model I had to do it too and I can stop him every time but you have to stop him to it can't just be me and you don't see that so I'm done
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*get mad and stomp foot again* "No. I won't let him."
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Yup you say that now but as soon as Jackson starts you just gonna let him do it
*seeing that she is starting to Kinda see it more so I push the subject a little deeper *
I guess it's nothing I can do *shrugs shoulders* well I'm gonna go watch tv
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*screams, angrily*
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Walks away and sits on the couch and flips the tv on *
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*kick the wall*
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Girl why you kicking the wall the wall didn't do it
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*yell* "Jackson's not here."
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I know that but still you don't gotta hurt the wall
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"Then what do you want me to hit?"
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I really didn't want you to hit anything right now I just was trying to tell you not to let Jackson bully you and abuse you don't have to tear up the house don't get mad at the house and I was saying only fight him if he's hurting you
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"but now I"m mad"
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Will work out your anger on a pillow not the walls
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*grab coach pillow and start punching it*
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Well I'm going to see Jackson tomorrow you can come if you want
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"Okay." *surprised that I am not happy at the idea of seeing him, but am just mad*
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Alright go take a bath and get ready for bed
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*go and start bath*
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Few hours later ever has eaten taken their bath and went to sleep*
*the next day I wake up get a shower get dressed feed the kids breakfast and takes amber with me to go visit Jackson*
*sits in the room and waits for Jackson to come in*
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Jackson
*enter*
Amber
*run up and give him a hug*
Jackson
*hug*
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So Jackson I brought Amber to see you because I felt like you might want to try again last visit didn't go so good
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So we can try this again
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Jackson
*glare at Ms. China, and look down at Amber* "Amber, are you ready to apologize yet?"
Amber
*stomp foot* "No!"
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I told you she wasn't apologizing to you she haven't done anything
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Jackson
"She knows better then to talk back to me." *look at Amber* "Your a helpless little girl and you know it."
Amber
"No!" *kick him*
Jackson
*look at her, in shock*
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Sees Amber kick him thinking I didn't think she would actually do that*
*looks at Jackson looking shocked*
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Jackson
*try to repress the urge to shove her to the ground* "Why did you do that?"
Amber
"Because I'm mad at you."
Jackson
*shocked*
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Listens to see how this conversation will go*
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Jackson
"That was really stupid of you Amber. Your so weak that you can't even kick hard enough to hurt me at all."
Amber
*start to feel more sad then angry, look at Ms. China*
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You really gone still be mean to amber?
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Jackson
"She just kicked me. What am I supposed to do? Are you sorry Amber?"
Amber
*meekly* "I don't know."
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I think you supposed to see that when you mean to her you rally are making her sad and she has feelings too:
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Jackson
"Well I already knew that. Are you sorry Amber?"
Amber
*look at Ms. China*
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Nah she anit sorry
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Jackson
"She should be."
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Why you don't be sorry when you hit her
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"I only hit her when she needs punished."
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And I told you that's not your job anymore.
It's mine.
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But that's fine. If you feel like people should automatically hit someone for doing something as you say "bad" then that's what's gonna start happening to you. I'll treat you like you treat amber
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Jackson
*looks scared*
"What works with Amber is not going to work with me."
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I don't really care I just see that's the only way I can get it through your head
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And see how you just got scared? That's the same feeling amber feels when you do that stuff to her. So I guess you will learn the golden rule treat others how you want to be treated
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Amber
*whimpers in fear* "Please don't hurt Jackson."
Jackson
"If you want to treat me like I treat Amber, then you must approve of my treatment of her."
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No I don't. I can see that you never touch Amber and still treat you like you treat her. Or shall I say used to treat her because if it ever happens again I can make sure You never see Amber again.
*thinking that if I threaten him like that he will be nicer to amber*
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Jackson
*terrified*
Amber
*start sobbing*
Jackson
*wrap arms around her, comfortingly*
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Pushes Jackson back and picks Amber up*
Nope you don't get to touch her.
*takes Amber out the room holding the door so Jackson can't come out and whispers in her ear "don't worry i wouldn't do that I'm just trying to scare Jackson so he can be nice to you"
*puts Amber down* sit in this chair while I talk to Jackson *watches her sit down and goes back in the room*
Now you want to try me or what?
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Amber
*starts sobbing harder, when Ms. China takes me from Jackson, sit in the chair with Horsie comforting me*
Jackson
*just glare at her, noticing that I can hear Amber sobbing*
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Stand on the door so Jackson can't go out*
You better answer me. I've been way to nice to you now you about to see the other side me the side you really don't want to see.
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Jackson
"I think I've already seen it."
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Nah I promise you haven't seen any of that side yet
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Jackson
"Well you got mad when I tried to comfort Amber, now she's crying and your ignoring her."
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I'll get Amber when I'm finished with you. You think you can do whatever you want to amber that stops like right now. Do you want to be allowed to see amber or not ?
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"Yes, and I want to be allowed to take care of her."
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Well if you can't understand that taking care of her is my job now then you won't be seeing her
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"If I'm not Amber caregiver, I'm nothing."
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You her brother that's it
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"I've been living for her for three years. I can't really do anything else."
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I've been trying to teach your ass for the longest you not willing to learn
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"Teach me what? I don't know how to talk to other kids anymore, I've been failing school for the past few years, and I have nothing going for me without Amber."
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Duh I've been trying to teach you how to be a kid for the **** longest
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"No. You just sent me off to other people."
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Because you was being abusive to amber in the house I can't allow that and the time away from you has made amber more independent and she is Learning more
But I come see you and I talk to u I try to teach you stuff u just unwilling to learn anything
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"Why should I? You wrecked my life, and Amber's?"
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Amber is actually doing pretty well
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How about you go to some other house for a month and compare the difference between how I treat you and how they treat you
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"She doesn't seem to be. She just kicked me. When she was in my care, she was perfect. I don't think anyone else would be worse then you."
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She kicked you because you do dumb **** to her. She got mad at you I don't see the problem she just doing what you teach her
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"I taught her that I can hurt her but she can't hurt me. You must have taught her that violence."
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No u might say that but by doing something to someone repeatedly that's teaching them it's ok actions speak louder than words you get mad so u hit she got mad so she hit
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But whatever how about the idea of u going to some other house and comparing the differences ?
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"I'm sure it will be better then you, since whoever they are won't be damaging my baby sister."
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Okay done. Tomorrow you will be with another family for a month. They will pick you up from here and in a month I'll come visit you and see if you like it better there if you do u can stay if u don't you can come back with me if you learn to be nicer
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"Can Amber come?"
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Heck no amber likes being with me.
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Jackson
"Well I like being with her, and she likes being with me more then her."
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You think I care about what you think?
No I don't okay we'll see u in a month
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Jackson
"Fine."
Amber
*still crying*
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Would u like to say bye to Amber?
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Jackson
"Of course I do. Can I?"
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Are you gonna tell her something mean?
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Jackson
"No."
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Actually I'll make another deal with you first
You interested in hearing or do u want to do the going with another family first?
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"What is it?"
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You can come home for a month and I'll see how your behavior is if it's good then u can continue being at home if it's bad then you can go to another family for a while and compare differences
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*excited* "Really? So I can be with Amber?"
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Yeah but I don't know about it because you haven't became any nicer to her
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"Well you just said that I could."
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I know under the condition that you won't hit her and you will be nice
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"She just kicked me, and you were fine with that."
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I was ok with that because she never got to ever hit u back or nothing so that's one time that she get away with it
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"Fine. I won't hit her, and I'll be nice to her."
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And you song control her. You have to understand I'm her parent now I'm in charge of her you and the other kids in the house
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*sigh* "I'll try."
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Ok if you mess up you going to military school
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"fine"
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Okay. That's our deal
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"Okay. May I see her now?"
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Opens the door* Amber come here
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Amber
*wipe tears away with Horsie, get up, walk in, look at Jackson*
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Jackson what you gotta say to Amber?
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Jackson
"Come here."
Amber
*walk up to him*
Jackson
"I love you."
Amber
"I love you too."
Jackson
*wraps arms around her, into a hug*
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Okay Amber. Let's go home. Jackson I will see you tomorrow get your stuff packed.
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Amber
*look back as we leave*
Jackson
*hope she doesn't change her mind*